I was happy letting Life lead me....and then it stopped.
I was SO happy being dragged around by LIFE. I had worked so hard to train LIFE! I put processes and systems in place for my work and for my family life to allow for routines and clients to lead me from task to task. I could go to bed feeling tired, wake up energised to grab the end of that leash and start running behind my healthy, happy, bouncy, LIFE. You know, to keep up! That’s what it’s all about right? This is success? Making the most out of my time? Creating a LIFE WORTH LEADING? Errr…a LIFE WHICH IS LEADING ME? Hmm…!
But last week my LIFE stopped running its usual path. Sydney went into another Covid lockdown and all those processes and usual routines stopped! LIFE sat starting at me with its leash in its mouth, asking “which way now?” I had no pull from LIFE as I knew it. No sense of urgency from LIFE to jump up and run. LIFE wanted ME to lead?! I was stumped! I could hear crickets in my head! What’s the motivation again? Where was I headed?
It’s only in this moment that I realised, my life has been somewhat on autopilot (through my own design) and I was enjoying it, absentmindedly. But when the running behind my life stopped, I seemed to lose purpose, clarity and motivation. I felt sad, frustrated, lonely. I felt panic, stress and anxiety. My thoughts were “what do I do now?” and “quick, keep running!”.
Are you here with me in this uncomfortable space? Maybe you are going through a similar shift to your routine? Has something unexpected happened and you have had to stop mid step? Do you need to recalibrate where you are headed again?
Often, when our every day life dramatically stops and changes, without expectation, we are stumped! However, it’s not really something to fear. There is a silver lining and we must look at it as an opportunity! An opportunity to realign our thoughts and behaviours with our authentic intention. It requires us to surrender to the situation, to the moment and to all the emotions and thoughts that come with it. It is only through this surrender that we are able to find clarity and start moving again in the direction we want. Yes, it’s a process and not always fun. Yes, it will be uncomfortable. Yes, you will lose the ‘momentum’ you got used to (you actually lost it awhile ago). But now you get to create it again, only with more clarity and intention!
As I surrender to my current reality and sit still in the uncomfortableness of my own mind and body, I am comforted by the teachings from the wise, which I can put into practise. Because I know that LIFE is going to get back up and start moving again, but I have the opportunity to lead it with intention and to realign it with my purpose.
Here is some ‘food for thought’ through the Surrender Process that I am keeping at the forefront of my mind. If you are going through it as well, consider these as you go inward, create awareness and act with deep intention.
Food for Thought
As you Surrender
Fear of change is a trigger for a fear of powerlessness. A fear for loss of control. A fear of not belonging and being unloved. In the days where this fear was absent, I didn’t have more power or control or love.
Reacting to high intensity of emotions - sadness, panic, stress, anger, frustration - will bring out consequences aligned with those reactions. They will be fleeting and I will regret them.
Avoiding the pain and uncomfortableness by distraction will only lead me to make misaligned decisions and offer temporary relief.
Allow awareness to develop beyond the 5 senses. Go inward.
More peace, more quiet is good for the nervous system.
Untangle my thoughts by asking myself - ‘what is my intention with this?’ and if the response is simply ‘to feel better’, make sure I choose what is healthy.
I know this is a process but it’s an important one. If you’re on this journey, I encourage you to jump right into it. Keep connected with your loved ones through it and reach out and share with me if you are inspired to. Daily reflections and journaling can help immensely with this and so can sticking to your 3-Non-Negotiables!